Sugar cravings, boredom and a public meltdown. And that's just you

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Image: Things you only know if: you've taken a chlild to a supermarket

Solveig Osk / CC BY-SA 2.0 / adapted / Flickr: tauress

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Child in trolley

Jens Olaf-Walter / CC BY-SA 2.0 / adapted / Flickr: 65817306@N00


1. They will want to sit in the trolley

(Even if they’re 14.)


2. There will be a public meltdown

When a child enters a supermarket, all social barriers break down. It’s like chucking-out time at Wetherspoons. Tears, anger, tantrums, police sirens …

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World of pain gif

Via The Big Lebowski / Gramercy Pictures /


3. They will be bored

Even though they’re in a massive hyper-megastore full of widescreen TVs, toys and delicious treats, they will act like you made them stand in a really long queue at the DVLA.

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Bored kid shopping gif

Via Erbos /


4. You will lose them for hours

Not seen your kid since the produce aisle? Chances are they’ll be "experimenting" with the tongs in the bakery.


(Do you pay for the half-eaten iced doughnut at the till – or eat the evidence?) 


5. They will want awful sweets

Approximately every 30 seconds, you’ll be presented with increasingly outlandish confectionery which you will refuse to buy. You’ll feel like a Quality Control Oompa-Loompa.

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Wonka gif

Via Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory / Warner Bros /


6. They’ll put something rogue in the trolley

Did you choose that Spongebob magic growing flannel and the giant bag of Tangfastics?


Oh no, you didn't.

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Spongebob pinatas

Mike Mozart / CC BY-SA 2.0 / adapted / Flickr: jeepersmedia


7. They’ll embarrass you

Should you venture into the booze aisle, your child will take the opportunity to loudly announce: "My mummy drinks wine every day".

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I hate you gif

Via The Golden Girls / NBC /


8. They will run through the aisles like feral bobcats

Just as the sun rises in the morning and sets at night, kids will run through the supermarket and old ladies will look up from their tins of marrowfat peas and tut. It is nature's law.


9. They will develop strange and unusual desires

Suddenly your kid will see a brightly-coloured package and say "Mum, we never have anchovies / kumquats / Bakewell Tarts. Can we get them?"


Impressed at their increasing sophistication, you will buy them. Then, when you serve it, they’ll look it like it’s dog poo. 

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I want it gif

Via Family Guy / FOX /


10. They have no concept of the bagging area

For God's sake stop sitting on it, you unexpected item.

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Baby on checkout

Juhan Sonin / CC BY-SA 2.0 / adapted / Flickr: juhansonin