After the hilarious Dame Edna Everage-fuelled chaos in the Bake Off tent last week, the new batch of intrepid charity bakers had a lot to live up to
Fashion guru Gok Wan, Strictly winner Abbey Clancy, YouTube star turned novelist (well, kind of) Zoella and Wossy aka Jonathan Ross wielded their whisks and battled it out last night over cupcakes, profiteroles and a marble cake that required a lot of structural integrity.
With the constant danger that the internet might go into meltdown at the sight of Zoella with a lovely fishtail plait making cupcakes, everyone was nervous – especially Wossy who gets teaspoons and tablespoons mixed up. Really.
The baking started with 24 cupcakes, which shouldn’t have been too taxing on our celebs but, you know, tent pressure got to them. Wossy went for lapsang souchong cupcakes with whisky icing (which went down a treat with Bezza) but the eggs curdled. Gok used shop-bought fondant icing for his geisha cupcakes that resembled Roy Orbison (good spot, Hollywood) but escaped the wrath of Mary (er, how?! Jordan, are you listening?). Abbey's and Zoella’s cupcakes looked pretty good but both their icing split.
For the technical challenge, Mary Berry turned all Dr Evil and tasked the bakers with 20 profiteroles. Paul insisted on pronouncing them “pro-feet-er-roles”, which was almost as wrong as asking the bakers to fill them with red crème pat.
Choux pastry can be a bit hit and miss so it was no surprise that there were mixed results – mainly because no-one had the foggiest when to put the eggs in. Wossy’s looked more like biscuits but Gok’s prayers to the profiterole god (yes, he did that) were answered and he took top spot.
Onto the showstopper: a 3D marble cake inspired by a building. Yep, nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Bezza recommended sticking to something simple, like a garden shed, but Gok showed he was not a celebrity stylist for nothing and went for recreating The Shard, as did Clancy. Wossy took on the Royal Albert Hall (Italian meringue dome and all) that had us longing for Dame Edna’s Sydney Opera House, while Zoella made a Brighton beach hut which looked like it had been in a hurricane.
It was no surprise that Gok took star baker but we think there should have been some other awards for the night:
Most humble baker: Abbey Clancy
“It looks like slime at the minute” – on her cupcake mix
“Mine look like brains” – on her profiteroles
“It’s a rod covered in chocolate” – on her showstopper
Most competitive baker: Gok Wan
He can’t bear to lose and “gave it 190%.” Got it?
Cleverest baker (kind of): Wossy
He played to Bezza with his whisky icing: “I think you should forget the idea that it’s a tea-infused cake. It’s a whisky cake and really rather fun.”
Most dangerous baker: Zoella
Well, she nearly choked poor Bezza. Give Queen B a gin. Quick.
Best insult masquerading as praise: Mary Berry
“You’ve showed us … different skill” Oh Wossy, she didn’t mean it. *ahem*
Best mispronunciation: Paul Hollywood
He may love them but calling them “pro-feet-er-roles” is just not right, Paul.