Can we have her too, please?
MasterChef Australia gets all the luck.
Aussie chef and competition judge Matt Preston (no, we'd never heard of him either) has revealed that the fabulous Nigella Lawson will be spending a week "inspiring" contestants on the intense cookery programme.
He's right to be excited – La Lawson's unique brand of unabashed culinary revelry is exactly what lifts foodie telly to brilliant new heights. Marcus Wareing: kindly take note.
But what will contestants have to do to elicit a euphoric response from The Domestic Goddess? What will truly make her heart sing? What will procure her favour and adulation?
We've had some preliminary thoughts, and we reckon these might do it.
1. Put salted caramel in everything
Nige adores sea salt-spiked burnt sugar. So much so that one time, she used it as face wash. Naturally, it follows that if the MasterChef wannabes drizzle salted caramel goodness over their desserts (or anything else, for that matter) then they're on to a winner.
2. Bring out bold flavours
Like in this spaghetti with anchovies, the queen of British food is all about maximum taste. Smoked salmon cured with beetroot; brandy-soaked tiramisu and chicken liver sautéd with garlic should all do the trick.
3. Don't be afraid to go basic
From that fateful avocado and toast to this divine-looking sweet potato mac 'n' cheese: Nigella isn't a Michelin-starred type, so keep the foams and sous videing to yourself, please.