How about a Christmas dinner burger washed down with sprout juice and a Christmas pudding pizza to follow?
When you’re a proper adult (whenever that is), Christmas becomes less about tearing into the presents while it’s still dark outside and more about how many mince pies and slices of turkey you can eat.
This year our festive favourites are experiencing something of a mashup, so if you find a Brussels sprout hard to stomach then you might want to look away now.
Beat these, Santa.
The Christmas burger
What is it? A Christmas dinner in a burger with ALL the trimmings (and we mean all)
Where? K West Hotel & Spa, London
We say: is there nothing they won’t put in a burger?
Christmas dinner pizza
What is it? Laden with turkey, pigs in blankets, chestnut studding, roast potatoes, root veg, redcurrant compote and bread sauce
Where? We’re staying with the Mayfair Pizza Co for a moment
We say: the full festive feast on one plate of dough. Moving might be tricky after this …
The Christmas nugget
What is it: buttermilk-fried turkey thigh, ginger pigs in blankets wrapped around a melting cheese sauce core in a crispy panko crumb and served with cranberry ketchup
We say: this is like a scotch egg but with a cheese centre, apparently. We’re confused
What is it: turkey and a cranberry sauce surrounded by pillowy soft dough
Where: Zucker Bakery in New York
We say: these may have been invented for Thanksgiving but we have a suspicion that they could be sticking around for December too
Brussels sprout juice
What is it? Hardcore purists can take a neat shot of the green stuff but otherwise it comes mixed with fruit juice
Where? It first raised its green head last year and it seems it’s back. Try whipping some up at home (just make sure you have a nose peg to hand)
We say: love them or hate them, they are a Christmas Day staple (just maybe not in juice form)
Mince pie cocktail
What is it? You can use bourbon, rum, or gin
Where? Numerous bars will be shaking and stirring this Christmas cocktail or you could make one at home (try this recipe)
We say: what’s not to like?
Christmas pudding pizza
What is it? Pieces of Christmas pudding crumbled onto a pizza and served flaming with a good dollop of brandy custard and redcurrant compote
Where? Mayfair Pizza Co
We say: well, we do like a Nutella pizza …
Buck’s Fizz marmalade with edible glitter
What is it? A dash of prosecco, Marc de Champagne, glitter (that’s right) and Seville oranges
Where? Fortnum & Mason
We say: it would be rude not to